I thank God for the marriage testimonies of the General Overseer of The Redeemed Christian Church of God (RCCG), Pastor E. A. Adeboye, who has illuminated our understanding that marriage can still last ‘till death do us part.’
Marriage is a legally recognised relationship between two mature people of opposite s3x living together as husband and wife, except for the recent cases of gay marriages. It was originally meant to be ‘till death do us part’ but it seems this has been defeated. Cases abound of marriages that are not up to two weeks that suddenly hit the rocks.
The marriages of our forefathers lasted probably because of their understanding of what marriage was all about and the value system which abhorred raising children outside wedlock. It was even an abomination to divorce one’s wife or husband in those days.
The gradual erosion of our value system over the years as a result of modernisation has made the society to embrace divorce. Some couples today are not even mature to go into marriage, let alone paying the sacrifice the institution required.
He affirmed this during his 50th marriage anniversary when he said God had helped him to face the reality of marriage and that with patience, his marriage had been glorious.
Many marriages have indeed collapsed because of trivial issues such as the type of toothpaste and cars to use, positioning of pillows on the bed and engagement of housekeepers.
Family influence and expectations from couples, choice of partner, imposition by parents, religious incompatibility, unresolved differences are other factors traceable to the high rate of divorce today.
According to Pastor Adeboye, his love for his wife, Foluke, is new and fresh everyday over the past 50 years of honeymoon. This is wonderful and commendable, but many may think it is so because he is a man of God.
Adeboye knew what he wanted and so set his priorities right. His wife did not marry him because of riches, position or success, as he said he was probably the least qualified among those that could have married her.
For any marriage to last, God must play an important role. Love, understanding, trust, honesty, faith, maturity, sacrifice, responsibility, determination to succeed, forgiveness, communication, and open mind are also necessary. With understanding, there will be less disagreements, while issues will be resolved without allowing them to degenerate to a level of looking at each scornfully.
Relationships that lacktrust will definitely not last; you cannot build something on nothing. If the husband and wife trust each other, they will not read meaning into each other’s actions or inactions.
Adebisi Akolade
Kwara State Polytechnic, Ilorin.